After reading the latest edition of the Rock Breeders Gazette I happened upon your article on Sexual Harassment being made compulsory in the workplace. Being a woman in today’s society, this is a subject very close to my heart and I felt compelled to write this letter to you.
For many years I have been employed in various roles and I have to say that I have formed a very strong viewpoint on the subject of the violation of basic human rights for the common employee.
I would like, therefore, to go on record as saying that I have found the level of Sexual Harassment in this country to be appalling. In my experience and in the many places that I have been employed such levels have been either woefully inadequate or totally non-existent. It is not through want of trying on my part. I have consistently placed myself in situations where one would expect an occurrence of at least a mildly titillating nature, but to no avail. I have made myself available time and time again only to be disappointed at the lack of this most basic feature of job satisfaction. My attempts at sexually provocative actions such as the bending over to retrieve fallen writing implements have only resulted in a recurring back complaint and the flirtatious fluttering of eyelids has left me with a permanent squint with no harassment for my efforts. My complaints to management have gone unanswered or at the least been treated as a matter of amusement, a reaction I cannot for the life of me understand. Yes, I would definitely say that Sexual Harassment today is at an all time low.
It is high time the government in this country recognised every persons right to decent Sexual Harassment and indeed introduced laws to make it compulsory in the workplace. I, for one, would welcome this move and would go as far as to say why not extend this law to supermarkets (Asda in particular-no reason), pubs and clubs, airports, hospitals, public transport, warehouses, shops of any description, outside shops of any description, pavements, staircases and escalators. I would however draw the line at places of religious worship but only because I don’t go there. Oh fuck it, why not – I might.
Felicity Hornbucket (Miss)
Phew! Thanks for that Miss Hornbucket.
On to the Abuse of Inanimate Objects act. There must be something wrong with our legislators when they ban customary activities without any thought as to how they are to be replaced. Perhaps it's some sort of biological need in them or maybe they're just mad. Or stupid. Or both.
Our 'what wanker built that?' page today contains one of my favourites; the Crooked House pub in Gornal near Dudley, West Midlands.
This begs the question: Was the pub actually opened before it was built? Hence the drunken building?